It would have been poetic for the Yankees to lose their last game ever at Yankee Stadium, thereby clinching a playoff spot for the Red Sox. But really, how would the Red Sox team and the fans have celebrated that development? Basically, it would have been done privately, since the Red Sox (who beat the Jays yesterday in Toronto) were on their way back to Boston last night.

Instead, the team sends Josh Beckett to the mound tonight versus Cleveland. Could the pitcher and opponent be more apt?

Beckett threw a gem in Game 5 of last year’s ALCS versus Cleveland, when Boston trailed three games to one. That performance reinvigorated the Red Sox, who didn’t lose another game the entire postseason.

For all intents and purposes, Boston’s postseason begins tonight. Win and we’re in.

After that, focus on winning the American League East.

It’ll be interesting to see how Francona sets up his pitching staff for this final week: Will he make adjustments in trying to win the division title? Or will he (essentially) concede the division to Tampa Bay, focusing instead on setting up his starting rotation for round one of the playoffs?

First things first, however: The Sox need to win tonight. Do that and the team (and the fans) can do some celebrating on the home field.

My math might be a little hazy, but with a sweep in tomorrow’s doubleheader against the Blue Jays, coupled with a Ray sweep at the hands of the Yankees, the Red Sox would be tied for first place. Then again, if things go the complete opposite, the Sox could be 4 back at the end of the day. Or they could…well, you get the picture. A lot of different scenarios are in play. But the bottomline? It’s the middle of September and I’m pulling hard for the New York Yankees. Hell, I might even go out tomorrow and buy their hat.

OK, fine, that’s going too far.

Thoughts while counting down the hours until the 2008 MLB All-Star Game!!!!…

Conversation of the Week:

(Ring…Ring…)

RL: Hey, this is Rich.

MR: (Singing) Rollin’ down the street smokin endo, sippin’ on gin and juice! Ahhhhh!! Bahahahaha!!!

RL: Huh? Manny? What the eff are you doing?

MR: It’s the sixth inning, mang! I’’m on my phone!

RL: That doesn’t answer my question. And why are singing Gin and Juice?

MR: I keep my phone here now!

RL: You don’t see why there’d maybe a problem with you talking on it during a game?

MR: Waitta second. I thought Javy Lopez retired. And since when does he pitch? Isn’t he a catcher?

RL: Dude, the game’s back. Get on the field.

MR: K! We still on for the X Files movie on Friday?

RL: Yup.

MR: Pinky swear?

RL: I’ll talk to you later

(Sarcastic) Logical Move of the Week:

You wonder why some organizations hit rock bottom and build themselves back up, while others remain entrenched in the asbestos filled basement of their respective league. Earlier this week, Elton Brand signed with Philly for 5 years and $80M. Sure, he’s coming off major surgery, but this isn’t 1985 when a torn ACL could derail a guy’s career. It’ll probably take Brand a year to get back to full form, but once he’s healthy, the Sixers will have four year’s worth of one of the top five power forwards in the league. Brand’s averaged 20 and 10 (not to mention more than two blocks) for his career. He’s 29, and unless injuries become an issue, will be giving the Celtics headaches until 2013.

Voting for the All-Star Game at the Ashtray in the Bronx ends tonight and several Red Sox are engaged in the fights of their lives¹, so follow this link to the official All-Star ballot at MLB.com, and throw your support behind Jason Varitek, Dustin Pedroia, Kevin Youkilis and J.D. Drew, who are all in close races to become starters. Let’s have an All-Star Game with as many Red Sox (and as few Yankees) as possible. After all, if the American League wins, the Red Sox will have home-field advantage in the World Series. Ya know, provided the Tampa Bay Raymonds stop handing us our lunch.

¹ or not

* Josh Beckett hasn’t pitched like the guy who led the Sox to a World Series title last year, but expect him to be on his game versus the D’Backs and Dan Haren tonight. In the past, a familiar knock against Beckett was that he tended to lose focus versus lesser opponents, yet brought his A game against perceived challenges. Haren is certainly that. Besides, the game is on ESPN, so expect Beckett to look pissed and focused.

* I’m working on an investigative piece, trying to determine if the 2008 Red Sox pitching staff owns more necklaces than any staff in baseball history. There’s a lot of rope around these necks, and I comfort myself in thinking that these necklaces are made of hemp, and that Beckett, Okajima, Wakefield, and Timlin will be smoking their necklaces in celebration of a third World Series title in October.

* To the Cardinals’ players who had their pant legs pulled up and their red-and-blue striped stockings on proud display this past weekend: I saw “Sex and the City” with my wife, and Carrie Bradshaw wants her look back.

* Craig Hansen, my confidence in you grows every day.

* The Sox called up Jed Lowrie to take over at shortstop, right? He’s just lost en route, correct? Perhaps Lowrie needs Lou Merloni to bring him up to speed on the best backroads between Pawtucket and Boston.

Red Sox starter Curt Schilling, who’s currently on the 60-day disabled and unsigned beyond this season, said once again that he won’t pitch for the Yankees next season, even though many Boston fans would love to see the washed up 38Pitches playing the role of Sox mole next season in the Bronx, when the Yankees open their new stadium.

Schilling, deluded in thinking that "What have you done for us lately?" doesn’t apply to him, laughed at the idea that he would ever play for the hated Yankees, a notion his personal doctor, Dr. Craig Morgan, floated on WEEI radio.

"Me wearing pinstripes, regardless of what point of the season or my career it would have been, is not an option," Schilling later said on WEEI. "I can’t … think back to having that conversation specifically … it’s not an option. Never has been an option."

But why not? Ramiro Mendoza and Mike Stanton became Yankees for life by bringing their washed up games to Boston. If Schilling wants to win a permanent place in the hearts of Red Sox fans, he’ll sign a big contract with New York this offseason. Ya know, after he pitches for us in October.

Rem Dawg and DODB are back for another season." alt="Rem Dawg and DODB are back for another season." mce_src="http://wickedgoodsports.com/wp-content/images/martin/200_DonOrsillo.jpg" src="http://wickedgoodsports.com/wp-content/images/martin/200_DonOrsillo.jpg" />The Yankees and the Red Sox face off today in their lone spring training match-up and Don Orsillo’s decapitated bobblehead will be calling the live play-by-play action for Wicked Good Sports. So pour yourself a Guinness, snack on some corned beef and cabbage, and watch the Red Sox emasculate the Yankees on St. Patrick’s Day. Stay tuned, the game starts in 10 minutes and Don Orsillo’s decapitated bobblehead (henceforth, DODB) will be joining us shortly, accompanied as always by Jerry Remy.

12:57 — "Welcome, Red Sox Nation. Jerry’s downstairs finishing off his pre-game cigarette, but I couldn’t wait to welcome you to another season of Red Sox baseball. So, welcome and happy St. Paddy’s Day. I hope that, like me, you’re feeling no pain. Word today is that Dice-K Matsuzaka will be the starting pitcher when the Sox open the season versus the Athletics in Japan. Among those not making the trip to Japan, however, are Doug Mirabelli, Nomar Garciaparra and Carlos Quintana. Today’s match-up features Bartolo Colon and Andy Pettitte, whose dad was seen handing him something suspicious this morning. We’ll be tracking that developing story throughout the day." — DODB

1:03 "Michael Kay is dressed in puke green." — Rem Dawg.

1:05 "Jerry, what do you make of the team’s decision to cut Mirabelli?" — DODB

"My cockapoo is named Dog Mirabelli, so I think it’s rather unfortunate." — Rem Dawg.

1:06 "Michael Kay, how hard is to find a kelly green shirt?" — Rem Dawg.

Sox fans undoubtedly remember Eric Gagne, the erstwhile National League Cy Young winner who spent last fall trying to kill us all. Gagne, who seemed to implode during every big moment in his brief stint in a Red Sox uniform, is now plying his trade in Milwaukee, where he’s already listed as the third-leading cause of heart attacks. Still, for all the carnage the portly Canadian left in his Boston wake, at least he had the good sense not to blame manager Terry Francona or pitching coach John Farrell for his misadventures last season. Contrast that with everyone’s favorite Yankee, relief pitcher Kyle Farnsworth, who buoys the spirits of opposing fans everywhere, especially when he trots towards the mound in a close, late-inning game or lets loose with some pathetic excuse for why he’s the mayor of suck city.

Farnsworth, who last season allowed 108 runners to reach base in 60 innings, spoke yesterday to George King of the New York Post. In between his usual musings about 17-century French literature and the overlooked need for ethanol-based gasoline alternatives (no, not really), Farnsworth blamed his 4.80 ERA on former Yankee manager Joe Torre. Torre, it seems, had the gall to lose confidence in the Yankees’ middle reliever last season, refusing to pitch him on back-to-back days, even though the stats say, "Farnsworth sucks on back-to-back days."

"I always have confidence in myself. But it’s tough when you do lose the confidence from your manager to maybe prepare yourself, day in and day out when you have no clue about anything," Farnsworth said. "It happened a few times last year."